Thursday, December 8, 2016

Motorcycle (too much) Man!

For years I have struggled with overeating.  I've fluctuated back and forth between 25-55 pounds overweight.  Planning for a cruise I might get down to the low end of that spectrum and then during the cruise get halfway back up.  Ah, the joys of life in a human body.

Also for years, I have wanted another motorcycle.  When I was 20 I purchased a Suzuki GS1100.  Fantastic bike!  I only had it for a few months, but what a beautiful, liberating few months.  I immediately experienced the motorcycle wave and felt like I was part of something bigger than me. I had new friends (most of them female) who wanted a ride.  I went on a 9-state, 5000-mile road trip during the summer of 1993.  Utah, Idaho, Wyoming, Montana, Washington, Oregon, Nevada, Arizona, California.  For a large chunk of the trip my family was caravanning with me and I would alternate riders on my motorcycle.  It was awesome!

Ever since, I've wanted another one.  Every time I renew my driver's license I pay the extra $20 to keep my motorcycle endorsement, "just in case."  Since about the time I turned 40, I've started to become pretty vocal about it.  I'll drop hints around Christi, some subtle, some pretty obvious.  She has consistently told me (in her gentle manner) "NO WAY, YOU MORON!"  Until two months ago.  She came to me one day and told me how much she loves me.  She told me how she was concerned that the way I was eating was damaging my health.  We had both tried many times to help and support each other in being healthy and she had thought of a new incentive.  She said if I could get down to my goal weight of 195 pounds, I could get a motorcycle!

I was kind of floored.  I asked her if she was sure.  She figured she was trading one set of risks for a different set of risks.  I guess that makes some sense.  But now she's put me in this difficult predicament.  I can't whine about wanting a motorcycle any more!  If I really want one, all I have to do is lose 35 pounds.  That's it!  Simple! Not easy, but simple.  The first few days I was all in.  I lost 5 pounds just like that.  And then life, with all of its challenges and stresses and triggers, came crashing down around me and the chocolate, cold cereal and other addictively mind-numbing foods came to my rescue.

So here I am, no weight lost, and unable to effectively complain about my lack of two wheels.  In addition to this, I'm not really sure I would get a motorcycle even if Christi gave me the go ahead.  There are obviously a lot of risks.  But it sure would be fun to be able to actually weigh the pros and cons (in addition to my belly!) and come to a decision.  Before I can do that, however, I've got to lose the weight.

I've actually come to the conclusion that what Christi is really wanting is for me to wear these shorts again:


  1. It's not just the shorts she wants; it's the shorts with the white socks. Good luck, my brother!

  2. Grandpa Green is not saying this. 'Tis I, your mother. RETHINK THE MOTORCYCLE! You just might have to be taking care of me someday. And I will be more work than any three of your children. Your Loving Mother :)


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