Christmas 2013

We had a wonderful Christmas!  Our "no presents from each other or Santa" idea fostered a lot of extra time to create special memories.  We sent Santa a letter telling him all about the many things we have been given this year and how we would love if he would share our presents with another family.  As I'm sure you can imagine, this lifted a lot of the holiday stress from our lives!  We implemented many of the ideas given to us by you creative readers-- thank you!  One of our favorites was judging Christmas lights.  We found a "Best Holiday Lights" certificate online and printed out ten of them.  We then spent a couple of hours driving around different neighborhoods and finding beautiful Christmas light displays.  Our top ten received treats and a certificate.  I think that's one that will have to continue as an annual tradition!   We tried very hard to do something every day in December that would bring the spirit of Christ into our home.  We read lots of Christmas stories, watched Christmas movies, and had lots of fun with secret service.  Many days were busy with school and homework and activities and we were only able to do little things, but it still helped us keep our focus in the right place.   At one point we told the kids that we wanted them to each come up with their own idea of a service project that we would help fund.   For example,Taylor's idea was to pay for someone's groceries the next time we were at the store, which turned into a beautiful Christmas Eve memory.   We have been given SO MUCH and we are so grateful for opportunities to give back in little ways.   I am grateful for wonderful children who know what Christmas is all about.   (:

Of course, the kids did get to be on the receiving end too.   We had cousin gift exchange, gifts from grandparents, new p.j.'s from our adopted grandparents, fun neighbor gifts, and of course, grand bags.  Most importantly, we were able to spend time with lots of extended family-- we love you all!

  MERRY CHRISTMAS!

--Christianne

 Sophi and Alaya gave to each other

 She got her baby doll!

 Grandma's house

 Mariah and Jesi exchange gifts

 Celeste and Graci

 Lexi and Charity

 Cali and Charity-- Cali just loves her!

 Neighbor gifts waiting on our porch when we got home from visiting Grandma's-- thank you!!!!  We received one very special gift-- a Christmas jar--for which we are especially grateful.  If you are out there, please know how much it meant to us!

 Arby's and Christmas lights

 Jer kept telling them to smile, but Parker continually made faces at the last minute.  Ha.

 New jammies-- thank you, Russ and Candice!

 Grand bags!  (i.e. bags from Dad full of all your favorite, often non-healthy foods that you normally don't get and that you are not obligated to share-- big time fun!)

Every time Sophi pulled out something she would exclaim, "MY FAVORITE!"  She is so much fun!!!

The World of Candyland and the Amazing Ro

Jessica had to write a story for a 4th grade assignment.  This is it:

Once a pon a time there was a girl named Ro.She  lived in a country called rainbow land.She often would look around her.She had blond hair rosy cheeks a purple dress with a smile.She was a very happy girl.Ro was a very adventurous girl.She had  a big sister that was a girly girl type.After ten years passed in rainbow land 100 gummy bears turned evil [notice the "evil" gummy bears on the cover page].And when Ro heard  about it she was so so surprised then she went in and asked her mom what to do to help the people in the country of rainbow land.And her mom" sweetie you need more people to be able to fight.I know me and my friends are calecting more people but  we need to know how to fight them.Ro' s mom exclaimed  and hurry .Go in the shed it has plenty of things to fight with.Ro went and got the fighting stuff and her friends came and got the things to fight with.To defeat the bad gummy bears and then the girls turned the gummy bears back to good.and they had a feast and they ate all of it and every body lived happily ever after the end or is it.

We love our Jesi SO much.  If ever I was asked to fight evil gummy bears, I would want her by my side with her fighting stuff!

-Dad

Lexi and Dad...

…go four wheeling in the snow in Ferron, UT.  Good times!!!

The Measure of a Man

What does it mean to be a man?  I remember as a kid wanting to grow up and do the things my dad did: mow the lawn, drive, stand on the balcony railings as he cleaned the gutters.  All pretty over-rated stuff.  As a teenager I felt pretty manly when I came home from a pick-up basketball game having scored a lot of points or having viciously blocked a shot.  Getting my first real job felt pretty important.  Planning a fantastic date with my wife or going camping with my kids or even scraping the snow off of the van before I left for work to save Christi the effort have all made me feel like a man.

Today I attended the funeral of Grandpa Great.  He was a man.  As I watched dozens of pictures that had been put together on a video loop, I saw a man who took care of his family and a man who defended his country.  Several of the images were of him as a sailor in the Navy.  Pictures on tropical islands with his shirt off as he worked in the construction battalion.  The pictures were taken during relatively peaceful moments.  But there were many moments and hours filled with bombs and bullets.  He endured those moments and persevered and overcame.  A true man.  I am ever grateful to the men and women who have defended and continue to defend our amazing country and our hard-earned liberties.  Many of the pictures were of him with his wife.  Every interaction I ever saw of him with his sweetheart was tender and loving.  He obviously treasured her and put her welfare ahead of his.  A true man.

I had an experience today that made me feel like a man.  Perhaps more so than any experience I have ever had.  It took about 20 seconds and five steps.  As I carried my sweet Cali across the snow from the car door to where her wheelchair was, as I cradled her in my arms and did something for her that she simply could not do for herself, I knew that I was doing the right thing at the right time.  That I was doing what the ultimate example of manhood would have me do.  Somehow it eased some of my burdens.  It's not easy being father to so many.  But it is providing me opportunities for growth and love and service that I could not experience any other way.  I still hope that when I grow up I can be the man that Father in Heaven would have me be.  I'll keep working on it.  One step at a time.

Jeremy

Conversations

Only half awake, a groggy Lexi stumbles into our bedroom.  Jesi says, "Lexi, I can't find my glasses.  Will you help me look for them?"  Lexi replies, "Sorry Jess.  I can't right now.  I have to take a bath."  You can't make this stuff up:)

Today we attended Grandpa Great's funeral.  It was a wonderful day and fitting tribute to a great man. At the viewing, Sophi was very interested in talking to Grandpa Great and telling him goodbye.  She put her little foot on his hand and was very loving with him.  She was reasonably reverent during the service and had so much fun playing with cousins during and after the luncheon that was provided for family.  On the drive back to Grandma's house, Sophi was talking to Parker and said something about how it was sad that Grandpa Great died.  Parker replied, "But it's ok, Sophi, 'cuz now where is he?"  Sophi promptly responded, "In a box!"

Graci's Kingdom

Graci, Jess, Lexi, Xander live half of their lives in the make-believe kingdom that Graci created.  It is peopled with many characters.  Several of them are played by our kids, many are imaginary.  Names for the characters often stem from the middle names of our children.  Tonight at dinner I was half listening to the conversation they were having.  I asked Jessica a question and she said, "I'm not Jessica."

Me:  "Who are you?"

Jesi:  "Princess Annika."

Me:  "Grace, who are you?"

Graci:  "Princess Katianne"

Me:  "Sophi, who are you?"

Sophi:  "Princess Sophia."

Me:  "Lex, who are you?"

Lexi:  "Lilian."

Me:  "Princess Lilian?"

Lexi  "No.  Just plain Lilian.  I'm a villager."

Me:  "Oh."  (To Graci, the created of the kingdom):  "Why are the three of you princesses, but Lexi is just a villager?"

Graci:  "'Cuz she married Jake."

Me:  "Oh.  Why does marrying Jake make her a villager?"

Graci:  "'Cuz Jake's a villager."

Me:  "So did Jessica marry a prince?"

Graci:  "No.  She was born  princess."

Me:  "Oh.  Were you born a princess?"

Graci:  "No.  I married Jonathan."

Me:  "Who's Jonathan?"

Graci:  "Annika's brother."

Me:  "Who plays Jonathan."

Graci:  "Nobody, he's imaginary."

Me:  "How did you meet Jonathan."

Graci:  "Well, Max and Jonathan were playing kickball and I bumped into him."

Me:  "Is Xander Max?"

Graci:  "Well, right now he's Philip, but sometimes he's Max."

I think this conversation could have gone on forever:)

-Jer

Update on Cali

One of the commenters on a previous post asked for an update on Cali.  This person is considering an older child adoption.  So here goes:

Cali is doing unbelievably well.  Her English has really skyrocketed over the last couple of months and she has become very conversational.  She has many friends at school, including a fairly large group of girls that gets together monthly for "late-nights."  She loves to go to activities with our family, whether it's basketball games or band concerts or trips around town.  She loves her extended family and gets so excited when we are going to see grandparents, aunts and uncles or cousins.  

Her closest sibling relationships are with Graci and Jesi.  Grace and Cali still speak a lot of Chinese together (which makes Christi and me very happy).  Cali can't do every chore around the house, so we have a couple that she is able to do and does well.  Sometimes she helps Lexi get ready for bed.  She helps clear the table.  Occasionally she even cleans the bathrooms.  She generally helps out with a willing spirit and seems genuinely happy most of the time.  She does miss China and some of her relationships there.  She is very much looking forward to going back when we get Conner.

Older child adoptions can be wonderful. They can also have many challenges.  Our entire family has been so blessed with how well Cali has adapted and with how much she has bonded with each of us!

Jeremy

My Band

Taylor and Parker love playing basketball.  It's so fun to watch them together when they play on their Jr. High team.  I love how much effort they put forth and the teamwork and dedication they are learning.  It's fun that they're playing for their school team and often have friends cheering for them in the stands.  The pep band even comes and plays at the home games.  Taylor plays trombone in the band, and enjoys being a part of that during the JV games.  During the varsity games, Taylor is on the court instead of in the stands. 

After a recent game, Taylor asked Christi and me, "Did you hear my band cheering for me?"  We had, in fact, heard his band cheer loudly for him every time he made a shot.  I'm so glad the boys are getting this marvelous experience of shining in front of their friends.  And it's amazing how much more joy it brings to me than it does to him.  Parenthood is such a magnifier of emotions!

-Jeremy

A Great Night!

The day after Thanksgiving we went on a family outing.  While we were out and about I said to Christi, "You know, most parents don't get the sense of accomplishment that we do from simply taking the family out on the town!"  And I must say, it requires constant vigilance and razor-sharp senses to manage our crew on the road…

As a Make-A-Wish kid, Graci continues to get invitations to local events.  It's great!  We love the camaraderie of other families who understand, Graci feels special, and it offers us opportunities to do things we otherwise wouldn't.  On the day after Thanksgiving, Make-A-Wish was sponsoring free ice skating at a picturesque outdoor rink in downtown Salt Lake City.  Now you may be saying to yourself…"Let's see. Blind. check. Wheelchair. check. Missing limbs. check. Autism. check.  Yep!  This is a perfect group to go ice skating!"  Well, we weren't quite that brave.  We got a sitter for Elli and headed out with everyone else.  (It's important to remember just how poorly Elli does in crowds.  A night at home for her is generally much happier than a night when there is a ton of sensory input.)

To make it a bit more of an adventure, we decided to take TRAX into town.  We drove 10 minutes to the nearest TRAX station, hurried to get on the train cuz' we were barely going to make it, then sat on the train and waited…and waited…and waited….  What was going on?  Why wasn't it leaving?  I had looked up the departure times in advance.  So I picked up a paper schedule, looked it over closely, and finally found the fine print that on Thanksgiving and the day after, TRAX would be running on a Sunday schedule.  I quickly scanned what Sunday trains would be like and realized it wouldn't work!  They didn't run late enough to that particular station!  We had to get off that train before it left!  We all rushed for the doors and barely beat them.  Our excursion was experiencing a bumpy beginning.

Christi drove while I looked at the various options for TRAX.  It looked like we might be able to park at another station about half way into town.  The kids were excited to ride the train, and we already had non-refundable day passes, so off we went.  We parked, caught the train, and enjoyed the ride into SLC.  Lexi was particularly excited when we passed the Mill Creek stop.  (She attends Mill Creek elementary.)  Once we got to our destination, we walked a couple of blocks to the skating rink.

I'm sure we were quite the sight on the ice!  Christi or me trying to hold onto Sophi while maneuvering the large crowds on skates we weren't great on ourselves.  Lexi using one hand to hold her cane and grasping onto Christi for dear life with the other.  Graci flying solo but falling at least a dozen times.  (Poor girl!)  Jess clutching the rail on the sideboard with all her might as she traveled around the rink at whatever the opposite of light speed is.  The three boys really picking it up quite quickly.  (I was particularly impressed with Xander.)  And Cali, refusing to go out onto the ice in her chair.  (Fortunately, as a Make-A-Wish gathering, they actually had a designated time when only kids in wheelchairs and their helpers were able to be on the ice.  Cali and I went 15 or 20 times around the rink.  She became a bit of a star.  On one of her passes, Jesi held out her hand to give Cali five.  When other people saw it, they did the same.  Before we knew it, there were at least 75 people with their hands out waiting for Cali to give them five each time she circled the rink.  The whole skating trip was way more fun and way more successful than I had imagined:)  Sophi had a blast, even cozying up to the Grizzly Bear mascot of the Utah Grizzlies hockey team.

After the skating was done, Santa Claus came for a visit!  He completely fell in love with our kids.  He was quite overwhelmed and even became emotional as he talked to and held Sophi and Lexi.

From the skating rink we walked through downtown Salt Lake to City Creek Mall and ate at the Chick-Fil-A in the food court.

Sophi demands that the sunshade be down on her stroller.  Rain or shine.  Night or day.  She insists!

Taylor and Parker think they're too cool for the rest of us ;)

Graci sweetly entertains Lexi and Xander with make believe scenarios that have been ongoing for approximately forever:

Cali won't let me take a picture of her…

…but apparently has no problem with selfies!:)

After our meal, we walked a block or two more to temple square and saw the lights.  Wow that's a popular place!  It was the first night they were lit and I felt like we were navigating Disneyland during spring break.  (Yes, we've been daring (crazy?) enough to do that!)  The lights were amazing.  The life-sized nativity scene was particularly beautiful.  And the spirit that could be felt as so many people celebrated the birth of baby Jesus was a privilege to experience.

We boarded TRAX for the ride back.  There were some pretty colorful characters on the return trip!  We made it back home over seven hours after we had left.  Christi and I went to bed that night very tired:)  But we both felt so grateful for our wonderful kids.  They bring us so much happiness.  What a blessing it is to be surrounded by such spiritual giants!

-Jer

Learning Early

Christi took Elli to the doctor this morning, so I stayed home with Soph.  I was in my office working and had turned on "Sophia the First" for our Sophi to watch.  After a while she quietly walked in to see me.  Without saying a word she slowly came around my desk and over to my chair.  She leaned over the arm of my chair and gave me a soft kiss on the back of the hand.  "Thank you!"  I said.  Still wordless, she started to walk away.  Then she turned, looked coyly up at me with a sidelong glance and said, "Can I have a treat?"

Where do they learn this stuff???

-Jer

Did It!

When we moved into our new home in August, one of my goals was to be able to park both vehicles in the garage by Christmas.  Voila!

Thanks to Christi and the three boys for all of their help:)

Jer

Grandpa Great

I just received a phone call that my grandpa died peacefully in his sleep this evening.  My parents have been taking care of him in their home for the last few months and Dad was with him when he died.  I am so grateful that my parents were able to do this for him and I love them so much for it.

We have known for several weeks that Grandpa didn't have a lot of time left on this earth.  With Jeremy's encouragement, I went by myself to spend the weekend with him a few weeks ago.  I am so grateful for this special time with my grandpa.  We were able to have some good conversations that I will always treasure.  My dad gave him "rub downs" with lotion several times a day, and when I was there he let me take over.  It was a sweet experience.  The following weekend we brought the whole family down so that the kids could be with him.  He was always so good and so loving with my kids and they love "Grandpa Great" very, very much.

Grandpa is an important part of my life.  I say "is" instead of "was" because he always will be.  I know he lives on and will be with me in spirit for the rest of my life.  I am so grateful to know he is with my grandma-- possibly the sweetest woman to grace this earth.  We have missed her so much and I know that they are having an exquisitely beautiful reunion in heaven.  I can just hear her voice saying, "Oh, Philip!"

I am so grateful for each and every memory I have of this good man.  I am so grateful to have spent my life in close proximity to him.  His house was always a bike ride away and we lived on his farm.  This gave me countless opportunities to be around him and grow in my love for him.   He was thoughtful, strong. fun, a very hard worker, tender, a tease, a tremendous athlete, and the biggest BYU fan out there.  He was full of wisdom.  He served our country in WWII and I have always loved hearing his stories of the war and felt a deep appreciation for what he did.

I love you, Grandpa.  You will be so missed.

--Christianne

Fashion Hair Designer

Anything I could add to this would be superfluous.  A classic case of less is more:)



Jer

Emotionally Exhausted

Being a parent is so rewarding, so heartbreaking, so joyous, so painful, and requires so much of your energy and focus.  Just about every parent has had one or two or many of those times when you've had to stand up for your child.  Stand up for what is right.  I have been going through one of those times for the past few months.  The intensity of the experience ebbs and flows, and over the past week it has been overwhelming.  I am emotionally exhausted.  We've made some progress.  I guess that's all you can ask for.  I need a hug.

Jeremy

60 in 60

Though most of you probably weren't counting…I was:)  Today is day 60 and this is our 60th post.  We did it!  I've enjoyed feeling compelled to write something each day.  There are so many wonderful or painful or beautiful or poignant moments in our life, and I am so grateful for this medium that inspires me to keep a journal more than anything else ever has.  I love my family.  I love to write.  I love to write about my family!  And while I've fulfilled this particular commitment, I am determined to continue blogging on an (almost) daily basis:)

Thanks for tuning in!

Jeremy

PS.  Mariah, I hope you've enjoyed following our adventures!

Climb Every Mountain

Wherever you fall on the "should they have or shouldn't they have" scale regarding the live TV musical version of The Sound of Music, you must admit it was an ambitious undertaking!  We watched just a little of it (after swim lessons and two basketball games!).  I was impressed with the sets, the singing, some of the acting, and just the sheer guts it takes to perform a 3-hour program on live TV.  Today I found a clip of Climb Every Mountain on the web.  I was very moved and watched it several times.  I've no idea how many times I've heard that song over the years.  It is, of course, beautiful.  (As a wannabe songwriter I am pretty much in awe of Rogers and Hammerstein.)  But I really listened to the words for the first time today.  And how they fit my life!

Climb every mountain,
Search high and low,
Follow every byway,
Every path you know.

Climb every mountain,
Ford every stream,
Follow every rainbow,
'Till you find your dream.

A dream that will need
All the love you can give,
Every day of your life
For as long as you live!

We have climbed (and continue to climb) so many mountains, forded streams and raging rivers, literally crossed oceans and ice fields to find our dream.  To find our calling in life.  And it is certainly a dream that needs all the love we can give every day of our lives for as long as we live.  It has been a most unexpected and unique path we have taken.  And one I am grateful for every day.  (And one that I'm sure Maria Von Trapp can understand pretty well;)

I was moved to tears by this rendition.  I hope you enjoy it!  (Regardless of what you thought of this version of the story, this lady can flat out sing!!!)



Jeremy

Talented Toes

Please don't think that the number of posts about Sophi is an indication of us loving her more than the others!   Believe me, there is no lack of love going on in this home.  (:  Her cute factor is definitely high right now though!    The other day, Sophi was given a hamburger for her lunch.  I turned on the TV, put her lunch on the table, and went into the office to do something on the computer.  About 20 minutes later, Sophi came in carrying this:

She hadn't wanted to finish her hamburger.  So she had gotten down from the table, found a tupperware container and lid, put the hamburger in the container, put the lid back on correctly, opened the drawer with lunch bags, retrieved her lunch bag, unzipped it, put the tupperware inside, zipped it back up, found an empty grocery bag, put the lunch bag in the grocery bag, tied the grocery bag shut, and carried in to me to "save for later."

All with her cute little feet.  

Way to go, Sophi!  (:

Elli Belly

Our sweet Elli has been having a rough patch for the last couple of months.  She has fits of screaming, arching her body, and lashing out (hitting or biting) anything nearby.  It seems to be caused by abdominal pain, but when she can't tell us, it's hard to really know.   It could be other pain, it could be sensory-processing issues, it could be behavioral-- it's so hard to figure it out when dealing with someone with such limited communication.  We have taken her in for some blood work and x-rays and are awaiting being seen by a GI specialist.   In the meantime, I am grateful for a few things.  First of all, Elli has THE BEST teachers and principal and staff we could ever hope for.  They keep in daily communication with us about how things are going at school.  They are patient when it is hard to be patient.  They love on her, but also work with her on behavioral issues.  They keep logs and try new things and are genuinely concerned for her.  (Ok, I'm not joking-- as I was typing this, I received a phone call from them to go over some things that happened today.)  It is such an amazing blessing to be able to send her to school and know that she will be loved and dealt with appropriately.  Secondly, I am so grateful for the way this house accommodates Elli-- especially when Elli is having a hard time.  She has the most amazing room, complete with a trampoline, a swing, a keyboard, and music that can be piped through speakers (otherwise she would break the CD player.)  When she is having a really hard time and we cannot do anything to help her, I can put her in this room-- which has a lock on the door-- and know she is safe.  She almost always calms down when she gets to her room.  I don't know if she is wanting to be alone or just likes her special space-- but it almost always does the trick when she is very upset.   Because of the intercom system, I can hear her and talk to her and know that she is ok.  Unless you've had a nine-year-old who can scream at the top of her lungs and who you sometimes cannot reason with and who can break things and climb on things and wreak havoc and who cannot see and therefore can get hurt easily, you probably cannot appreciate how much this room has changed our lives.  Don't get me wrong-- Elli does not spend all of her time in her room.  We usually have her upstairs with us or in the room with the piano-- but when we need to, having a safe, happy place to put her and not have to worry about her hurting herself or others has been LIFE CHANGING.  We are so grateful.

I love this girl with my whole heart.  She is an angel in our family and I don't know what we would ever do without her.  I am so grateful for all of those who take care of her and are a part of her life.  Hang in there, Elli!  We love you!

 One time I told Elli to smile for a picture and realized that maybe she just didn't know what a smile was.  So I tried to turn her cheeks up with my fingers.  Now if I tell her to smile, she puts her fingers on her cheeks.  Ha!

Christianne

It Works

Jesi came into the kitchen before school yesterday.  I was making lunches and she wanted my attention.    "Mm-hmm."….."MM-HMM."…."MM-HMMM!!!"  Finally I turned and looked at her.  Prettty sure she was seeking my delight in some aspect of her appearance, I quickly evaluated her getup to figure out what it might be.  Aha!  "Jesi, your hair is SOOOOO beautiful!  I love the curls.  It looks fantastic."  Satisfied with my level of 'blown-away-ness' she cal my responded.  "I make it work, don't I."

Go, Jess.  You do, indeed, make it work!

Love you, darling,

Dad

Of course as soon as she heard the word "picture," Lexi wanted to be involved, too!

The Tie Guys

When I was in middle school I wore ties.  Not sure what sent me in that direction, but I became known for it.  My nickname was "The Tie Guy."  (A bit of foreshadowing perhaps?  I later served a mission in Thailand.  And just before I came home a bought 300 ties very cheaply and sold them on my return to the states.  The  Thai Guy…The Thai Tie Guy…you get the idea.)

Taylor and Parker are both on the varsity basketball team for Providence Hall Jr. High.  Taylor is a starter, and Parker is the only 7th grader on the team.  Way to go, guys!  Both of them are doing very well.  On game days the team wears dress shirts and ties to school.  Now I have two handsome "Tie Guys" of my own:)

-Jer